The Visit
by icecoldfunk
Summary: It's a year after the defeat of Ozai and everyone is getting together for the reopening of the Western Air Temple. Hormones and silliness abound. may contain traces of zutara and insanity.
1. Chapter 1

first time publishing a story on so CC welcomed but no ship bashing if you don't mind

The re-visit to the western air temple was not quite what Katara ever expected, gone was the comfortable solitude and intimacy of friends and family, replaced by the flat solitude and isolation of Aang and hers "co-habitation", which was further replaced by the bustle of engineers and craftsmen rebuilding and making safe what they could. It had broken Aang's heart when the lead engineers (on loan from both the Fire Nation and Earth Kingdom) had told him that one of the upside-down temples would have be removed, because it would never be safe for any number of people. Being the collaborative effort that it was, dignitaries from all nations would soon be attending the grand re-opening of one of the temples, and to the Avatar's growing dismay and frustration, the destruction of another.

The visitors from the Earth Kingdom and Northern Water Tribes were no-one that Katara knew, mostly bureaucrats with a few artists and scribes to record the event for the history books, but a heartfelt if somewhat typically cryptic letter that arrived from King Bumi was a welcome mood lift for the young Avatar.

The Southern Water Tribe contingent consisted of her own father, Pakku, Gran Gran and a few Fire Nation porters that Zuko had insisted assist them on the journey, not forgetting they surprise tag-alongs of Suki and Ty Lee, who were picked up on a port stop at Kyoshi. It was the Fire nation, and Katara smiled in pure delight and not a small amount of irony, that would bring most of her friends to visit, Toph was the new Earth Kingdom ambassador to the Fire Nation, her own brother who was studying, in his own words "just about everything" at the Fire capital university, Prince Iroh, having returned for a brief holiday to his homeland and Princess Ursa who had more or less attempted to adopt them all after she found out about how she brought Zuko back from the brink of death during the comet. Last but not least was future Fire Lady Mai who, to Katara's great delight, had also brought her own younger brother Tom Tom, and finally Zuko, Fire Lord Zuko…………….._engaged _Fire Lord Zuko………………_platonic BFF no matter what snarky metal benders care to say about it NOT that it is any of their Tui and La damned business _Fire Lord Zuko.

_Confusion_ Lord Zuko was more like it.

Today was about more than the awkward friendship between her and the current Fire Lord though; today was a time to see her family, biological and beyond, as once the war was over Aang had immediately set to work on re-building the air nomads, alone, with her. That is to say _finding_ new air nomads; Katara and Aang both still cringed if reminded of the one time Aang had tried to suggest the _other_ way.

* * *

"I'm sorry Aang, it looks like there's no records of any survivors in this town either." The town record keeper had been a not unkind man who had suggested records kept over the hundred year war may have been dangerous to the air benders themselves if they got into the wrong hands so it was just as likely that no records meant they may have been hidden rather than certainly dead. It was a cold comfort at best.

"I _know _that!" he took a deep calming breath "I'm sorry Katara, it's just at the rate we're going I'm never going to even be able to train another air bender."

"We can't give up hope, we-" Katara paused, that play still left her self conscious about that, and she tried for a different approach "We've only been searching for three months."

Aang however had gone very still, and even months after the event Katara found that traitorous, guilty giggles would sometimes still bubble up whenever thought of what happened next.

"Y'know" Aang drawled "We could always-" he turned to face her and tried for what he hoped was a roguish grin and wink. "-Try and make some new ones."

Katara couldn't help it, she laughed, his voice was still higher pitched than hers, crumbs of fruit pie still stuck to his cheek (she fought the urge to wipe them off with a cloth), and due to her latest growth spurt she was now over a head taller than him, again, and he was trying a line that was so _sleazy _that she wasn't sure even _Jet_ would have used it, Katara laughed so hard that her sides hurt and her eyes watered, and when she was done, Aang was gone.

He didn't come back for 11 days.

* * *

The re-fitted war airship…..or was that air warship?……drifted sidelong to the temple complex and crew quickly secured the craft and extended the gangway, and the first off the airship was Zuko himself; with aforementioned snarky earthbender clinging to his back.

"_Giddyap ostrich horsy!_" she pulled herself higher up and pointed forward.  
"Door."  
"Wha-" _DONG_ "OW!"  
"Don't wreck my airship, it's our ride home." He continued to walk across the gangplank straight towards her, arms wide to embrace her, Toph back pack and all.

"Katara! It's so good to see you, you never drop by anymore."  
Katara didn't even try to make a clever comeback, she just sighed into the hug, it was one of the many guilty pleasures about Zuko to her, albeit one of the more innocent ones, Zuko was bigger than her and it was nice to feel _hugged_ rather than _hugging_ someone else for once, she felt protected, safe, warm……..and he smelled nice too.  
It was in the instant the hug suddenly got _very_ tight that Katara realized something was up.

"_Toph!_" whispered Zuko as loudly as he dared.  
"Awwwww, but I missed Sugar Queen. Just enjoy the hug Sparky."  
Toph had wrapped herself around both Zuko and Katara, pressing them tightly together from hips to shoulders, Katara could feel the full length of their bodies touching and molding to one another, and with mounting mortification she was beginning to realize just _how_ happy Zuko was to see her, if the growing hardness between them was any indication.

"Uh……Katara, could you be convinced to ignore that please?" Katara just groaned and buried her face in his neck (which did _nothing at all _to help Zuko in trying to will himself under control) trying to hide the blush that was overtaking her whole face, and just as she thought it couldn't get worse Toph decided to intervene-

"_GROUP HUG!!_"

-and make it much worse.

Her entire visiting extended family was hugging, with her at the centre pressed bodily to Zuko as she had a rather insistent reminder that she wasn't the only one was having a har- having a _difficult_ time with the concept of platonic.


	2. Chapter 2

The group hug gradually dissipated to the point that even the maniacally grinning Toph loosened her grip allowing a heavily blushing Katara to pull away from a Fire Lord who could not look her in the eyes while he tried to be as subtle as he could about adjusting his clothes to conceal……uh….. Katara's mind went into emergency override as she tried to avoid whatever diplomatic "incident" that would result from pointing out the Fire Lords raging-

"_Zuko!_"

_-Temper!_ Raging _temper, _Katara mentally cursed as she anticipated Aang's patented tackle hug that he liked to give Zuko and judging by his 'oh crap' expression he had already realized the dangers of getting hugged by the Avatar while fully-

"Oof!"

_-Clothed!_ Fully _clothed_, because Zuko was most exceedingly _not_ _naked_ and thinking about Zuko naked and wrestling him to the ground, sweaty limbs writhing in constant competition for dominance was a _bad _thing, a very very _bad_ thing.

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Crap.

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Katara shook herself out of her reverie and was thankful that not all her brain was quite so occupied as she replayed the last few seconds in her head.

Aang had been about to tackle hug Zuko, check.

Zuko had, in one smooth motion, backed up and leaned forward while grabbing the shoulders of Toph's shirt, check.

He then flipped a _very _surprised Toph _over_ his head, and held her a few inches above the ground, lest she take affront to this and earthbend him into next week, _exactly_ where he had been standing about half a second beforehand………Check.

Katara looked over to the side where Aang and Toph had tumbled off in a dusty pile of limbs as one green clad arm raised unashamedly.

"I _may_ have deserved that."  
Katara heard a snort of suppressed laughter and was surprised to see Zuko risk a roll of his eyes, a sidelong glance and a smirk of shared private humor, he then jogged over to his two younger friends to help them, and she quickly followed to do the same. Zuko was helping Aang up while greeting him in a far more sedate manner, so Katara went to help Toph who was sitting up and dusting some of her 'healthy coating of earth' off.

"Toph are you ok?"  
"I'm fine, I'm fine. No need to thank me by the way, just invite me to the wedding."  
Aang who had overheard the young blind girl's declaration decided to interject.

"Of course we will Toph, air nomad weddings need at least one bridesmaid."  
Katara's expression froze, Aang didn't notice and began thinking aloud.

"But with no more monks to do the ceremony I guess I'm going to have marry us myself." He frowned in consternation. "I _am_ the Avatar though, so I should be able to do that. Right Zuko?"

Zuko coughed discretely into his hand. "I think perhaps you should greet the rest of your guests before thinking that far ahead." Aang got up and walked towards the other guests, but continued to talk.

"It's not that far ahead anyway, Katara and I should be getting married this spring, unless there's another war" He gave Zuko a mildly dirty look, as if the last one had been a personal deliberate inconvenience on Zuko's part.

"Hmm." It was a very diplomatic 'hmm', neither for nor against, however he did start walking faster. Who said Zuko was a slow learner?

Toph gave Katara a look, it was a look that somehow managed to condense all the verbal barbs, all the heaped scorn available in the world into one quirk of the eyebrow. If it was somehow spread, the entire world, perhaps the universe, in fact everything that _was not Toph_ would suddenly, perhaps subconsciously become aware that they in fact _were_ _not Toph_, and would lament, from this twist of her lips. It was a feat all the more impressive, for an expression, to come from a girl who did not know what facial expressions looked like. Regrettably for expression coinsures, Katara was watching Aang and Zuko's backs so she missed the _uber-scorn_ that would have otherwise gone down in the history books, and was left with a relatively mundane expression that only be described as, lost.

"What the _hell _was that Sugar Queen?" Katara seemed unresponsive.  
"But I'm water tribe…." She said in a small voice, far removed from the _Master_ waterbender who took down Fire Lord Azula.  
"_Hey! _Stay with me here, don't you zone out on me."  
"We haven't even talked about when……" There were definite notes of confusion.  
"_Oi!_ Don't you ignore me!."  
"We haven't even talked about _if!_" anger was beginning to creep in.  
"……." Toph realized something important was going on.

"_Who the hell does he think he is!_"

"_There's_ my girl."


	3. Chapter 3

Thankfully, for the political stability of the entire world and reproductive organs of the last known airbender, Katara was interrupted from her quest for vengeance and maiming by perhaps one of the few people in the world who could derail a Katara Grudge™; Princess Ursa. Initially Katara had been somewhat hesitant about Ursa; what kind of woman would marry a genocidal maniac like Ozai, or raise Azula for that matter? Iroh and Zuko both vouched for her, but it was still some way to go before she would trust her implicitly from their word alone.

All of this was swept to the wayside the instant she met her however; Ursa was strong, dignified, noble, and beautiful, and she reminded Katara of her own mother so much so that it _hurt_. Seeing Ursa, particularly around Zuko, revealed a whole new layer of grief that Katara hadn't even known remained, and Ursa had responded by holding her as she cried and finally began to accept that her own mother would have have been proud of her.

This interruption did not stop Katara from giving one mournful look at the path where righteous vengeance and severe beat downs were, contrary to her desire, not being meted out. She had _missed_ kicking ass and taking names damn it, but seeing Ursa was more important than vengeance, for now.

"Princess Ursa." Katara gave a deep formal Fire Nation style bow.  
"Oh don't be absurd child." Ursa glided forward and embraced Katara like the long lost daughter she treated her as.

"Thank you for coming, we missed you." Katara smiled into the folds of fabric, maybe good hugging skills was a fire nation thing. Ursa pulled away and gave a look of mock offence.  
"Then perhaps you should visit more often then, you can't expect and old lady like me to go gallivanting across the countryside anymore."  
Katara rolled her eyes at the 'old lady' remark.  
"I'm sorry Princess Ursa."  
Ursa waved her apology away.  
"No matter, we're all here now and I'm sure we have a _lot_ to catch up on. Oh and Katara dear how many times must I say, call me aunty."  
"Yes Aunty Ursa."  
"Now, where is the bathing area here? I think all us girls could do with a good soak and gossip."  
"We don't exactly have those sorts of facilities here Aunty Ursa, the monks weren't all that big on luxuries like that."

Ursa looked slightly horrified at the thought of hot baths deemed anything less necessary than food, shelter or air for that matter, but rallied magnificently.  
"Earthbender" She pointed to Toph who cleared her throat loudly. "I'm sorry Toph, _World's Greatest Earthbender and Metalbender Extraordinaire!_"  
"Thank you." Toph said sweetly.  
"and _Master Waterbender and Blood-_" Katara winced "Oh I'm sorry dear I shouldn't have said."  
"It's ok Aunty Ursa, I know you didn't mean it in a bad way."  
"Well, at any rate I think that between us a few minor renovations won't cause any problems."  
Katara Grinned widely, early thoughts of vengeance faded to the background as the thought of a hot bath, good tea (which Ursa stole from Iroh's stash) and female solidarity took hold.

"I think so too."  
"_Hell_ yeah!"  
"Toph, could you please gather the rest of the girls and Katara and I will look for a good room to set up."  
"Yes Aunty."

The room the eventually decided on was originally one of the monks old communal washrooms and was-in true monastic fashion-as spartan and bare as they came, it had little more that a few basins fed from a single water source all draining to a few grated holes in the floor. A few earthbending moves later, there was a circular stepped depression in the middle of the room, and a privacy screen in front of the door so that no one could look directly in from outside. Suki and Mai set up candles in little alcoves all around the room, Ty Lee went found some nice smelling herbs and flowers, and Katara filled the newly earthbent bath.

All the women in the room disrobed, and Katara realized she was the only one who kept her underwear on, it was a little embarrassing but no one seemed to take any notice, so Katara reluctantly shucked off the rest of her clothes, and began to scrub down with some of the soap that Ursa had brought, which smelled of lavender and other unidentifiable flowers. Katara ventured another look around and realized she was one of the least 'developed' girls there, aside from Toph who was two years younger than her to begin with, and she was only about the same size as Mai, who she had assumed for some reason was as flat as her personality, maybe because she still wore nothing but black. On the other end of the scale was Ursa who was _big_, that isn't to say large at all except for what is generally considered in the _right_ areas, and tall, taller that even her own father; in fact the more Katara thought about it the more she realized that Ursa was one of the tallest women she had ever met. Katara looked at the older woman and, perhaps because of her nakedness, it hit her, Ursa at whatever age she would not admit to, had a body that most young women would probably kill for, and a lot of young men probably had, if you considered Ozai. Katara looked to Suki who she caught looking at Ursa too, and they both shared the same thought.

'_I _hope_ I look that good at that age._'

Soon enough it was time to try the new bath so she stepped in………and immediately stepped out again.

"_Cold!_ I forgot about that, now we have to get Iroh or Zuko to warm the water up."  
Ursa waved the thought away.  
"As much as those two might _love_ to be invited in here-" Ursa said with a wink, she then held up her hand and a bright azure flame flashed into existence. "I don't think that will be necessary. Azula didn't get _this_ from Ozai."

Katara and Suki both stood shocked at the revelation, though everyone else seemed to either already know, or in Toph's case was blind.

"Katara be a dear and stir the water for me please."  
The water swirled around Ursa's feet as she strode in and stood belly deep with a look in intense concentration, and after a few seconds the water began to steam and all the girls stepped into the bath and sat on the underwater ledge.

* * *

"Hey Sokka, have you seen Katara?"

"Well hello Aang, it's nice to see you too. What has it been, nearly a year? Couldn't have been, because it seems like only yesterday you _took my baby sister away from her family all alone to a secluded hidden temple!_" Sokka glared down at the young Avatar.

"I can see you're busy, bye now!"  
"_Waitaminute! _Damn it!"

* * *

"Hey Zuko, have you seen Katara?"

Zuko quirked his good eyebrow, his _only_ eyebrow.  
"Not since I spoke to you."  
Aang seemed agitated at the news.  
"I haven't seen her for nearly an hour."

Zuko held his gaze for a few seconds just to confirm if Aang was trying to make a joke or not.  
"Toph mentioned something about making a bath in one of the washrooms."

"Oh thanks Zuko I'll go look there." Aang tried to run off for a few seconds, until he realized he was being held a few inches off the ground by Zuko.

"They are _bathing_ Avatar."  
"But Katara might need me"

Zuko tried for a different approach.  
"Katara and the women with her are some of the most capable women on the planet, my _mother_ among them."

"But I'm the Avatar, what if they need _me?_"  
_Screw this,_ Thought Zuko. _I suck at diplomacy.  
_"_They are not to be disturbed_, understood?"  
Something filtered though and Aang nodded quickly, so Zuko slowly but gently put him down. _Better not get caught then._ Thought Aang.


	4. Chapter 4

um, reviews please?

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"So." Called Ursa. "Who has gossip?"

It was Suki who spoke up first, she had lived with a large group of girls for long enough to realize how these things went, so it would be best to get the good news out of the way before everyone started complaining about their boyfriends and she felt like a heel for having things go well.  
"Weeeeell" she drawled "One of my Kyoshi Warriors is going to the Fire Capital University same as Sokka, and _she_ told me that Sokka has been spending an _awful_ lot of time in the crafting building. I think he is making one of those betrothal pendants, I think he's going to _propose!_"

"_Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!_" Squealed Ty Lee, as she jumped up and hugged her captain, seemingly mindless of their nudity.

* * *

"Hey dad" Hakoda looked up to see his son. "Check out my new sword, I spent weeks working on it."

* * *

"Hey, watch with the splashing Rubber Bones! Don't spoil the tea!"  
"Sorry Toph."  
"Let me get this straight, you sent one of you elite Kyoshi Island Warriors to the Fire Nation to keep an eye on my brother?"

Suki's face coloured with embarrassment at this.  
"She said she wanted to go." Suki mumbled "She thought she could try and learn some stuff to counter Ty Lee's pressure point strikes, I just asked if she would keep an eye on him."  
"Why didn't she just come to me directly?" Ty Lee looked genuinely confused "I'm sure we could have worked something out."

Mai gave a little snort of amusement.  
"Not every girl is happy to trade techniques with you for sexual favours Ty."  
"Why not?" She pouted "Everybody wins that way."

Both Suki and Katara's jaws dropped, but it was Suki alone who realized the natural conclusion and jumped to her feet to point accusing finger at the gymnast.

"You joined the Kyoshi Warriors to meet _girls?_"

"_Hey!_ Watch the _tea_ Xena!"

"Sorry Toph." "Sorry Toph."

"Like, duh? Elite Group of warrior women, no _way_ I'm going to miss that boat."  
"Just then too! You were feeling me up!"  
Ty Lee gave her captain a long, lingering look of appreciation.

"A little bit yeah, but some of the girls were telling me about you before and I just thou-"  
"_That was just a phase I went through! _Besides, I'm with Sokka now."

It fell to Ursa to broker for peace.  
"Trust me dear, Sokka wouldn't mind."  
Suki froze, blushed from head to toe and then sat down and huffed, as she tried to pretend the last two minutes never existed.

Katara decided to try and break the awkward silence.  
"This is nice tea, um peppermint and berry?"

Ursa nodded.  
"Peppermint tea with blackberry wine."

"Uh wine? Is that ok?" Katara was worried, she was underage and Toph was _way_ underage.  
"Oh don't worry." Ursa waved her concerns away. "It's not really wine, they just call it that."

This was technically true.

"Oh that's ok then."

Wine was nowhere _near_ that strong.

"More please."  
"Of course Toph." Ursa raised the pot. "Anyone else?"  
There was a chorus of affirmatives.

It was at this point something occurred that would forever in the history books as '_The Airbender's Folly_' though some more base and less charitable historians privately referred to it as '_The biggest avatar cock up since Roku dumped Sozin by a "Lets just be friends" note left on the fridge_. Aang had found the newly made baths, and was now leaning against the stone privacy screen to listen in.

"So!" said Ursa brightly. "Now that the topic has been broached, lets talk about sex!"  
There was a wave of embarrassed silence and blushing faces.

"Oh come now, I'm a single woman, if I can't have a love life that at least let me live vicariously through yours. Oh Ty Lee, put your hand down and stop _bouncing_."

"Yes Aunty Ursa."  
"Go on then, I guess someone will have to get the ball rolling."

Ty Lee smiled and held up three fingers, Katara hazarded a guess.  
"You've had three girlfriends since being at Kyoshi?"  
"Nope, nope, nope! I got three girlfriends right now!"  
"What?!" Suki gaped "Who?"  
"Ming, Ling and Xi"  
"Ming and Ling are twins!" Suki sputtered "and Xi is _married!_"  
"What can I say? I got the touch."

There was a pause as every person in the room wondered for a brief moment-What on _earth_ could she possibly do with_ three _girls?- except Toph.

"More tea please."  
"There you go."


	5. Chapter 5

Ursa however, was royalty born and bred, and it would take a lot more than the mention of a teenage lesbian _Ménage à Quatre_ to derail her train of thought; this ability is not gender neutral though, Iroh would have been rendered utterly speechless, and Zuko may have spontaneously combusted in an explosion of firebender hormones.

"So Suki, you mentioned a proposal, that last visit must have been something special?"  
Suki, amazingly, blushed even redder than before.

"Well there was a lot of kissing but we didn't go _that_ far honestly" Suki took a deep breath "I uh, I wanted to but the timing was bad and……and I'm not ready to have a baby yet. I mean I'm Capitan of my unit and Sokka is away for most of the year." She hung her head in embarrassment. "_And!_ He's at _university_, surrounded by all those Fire nations _hussies_ the rest of the time, uh, no offence."

"None taken." "None taken." "None taken."

"I'm just worried that he's going to forget about me."  
"Is that all?"  
"_Mai!_" Admonished Ursa "I apologize for my countrywoman's _astounding _insensitivity." The near livid Suki was somewhat mollified. "But she does raise a valid point, why didn't you just use birth control?"

Katara's confusion must have shown to because Ursa addressed her as well, however unknown to the girls, someone else was paying _very_ close attention.  
"Well it seems It's not-"

"_Tea me!_" This seemed _important, _so Katara quickly bent the tea straight into Toph's cup "T'nk you."

"Ahem, well it seems it's not well known outside of the fire nation, but we have a medication that lets you……have _fun_." Ursa gave a throaty chuckle and a languid smile. "Oh _Agni,_ it lets you have fun."  
Katara almost choked.

"_Waitaminute,_ you mean _Ozai!?_"

"Well not really much after Azula was born, and I was too busy on the run when I was banished, but during that honeymoon period." She made a low moan that Ty Lee would remember well on those rare lonely nights and made a certain eavesdropper almost swallow his tongue. "He was _great _in bed."

"_Ozai? The_ Ozai?Cheekbone city, gold eyes, goatee down to here, great hair and genocidal tendencies, _Ozai?_"

"Say what you will but there's something to be said for intensity, and he did spearhead the Earth Kingdom invasion to get my favorite candy."

"_What?!_" "_What?!_"

"Well it got him a second date."

Behind the screen the Bridge Between the Spirit World and Ours mulled these words over. Intensity, that was the key, that and it sounded like Katara didn't want to have babies yet; Katara could handle all the baby stuff, but intensity would be another thing, he tried to look _intense, _but in reality he just looked tired, short sighted, and constipated.  
Did the Avatar state count?

"Um, Aunty Ursa, speaking of Azula, I don't want to be a bother but…….how is she?"  
"It's ok Ty Lee, she's actually been improving. Zuko and Iroh took her to see the Sun Warriors and she's been a lot better since then."

* * *

"Ok, you overgrown _Gecko. _There's a new boss in charge here, and you're going to get me what's mine."  
The dragons circled, both thousands of years old, with minds powerful beyond human comprehension, and they watched as this strange little human stood and talked at them. The blue dragon slowed and stopped in front of the chattering primate, it's mind probing and scanning all the way.

"Yes, that's right, I am your new quee-"  
_CUT THAT OUT._

Later if Azula could be coaxed to talk about it at all she would say there was no noise, no voice, just knowledge that that is what the dragon wanted you to know, as if it just decided you would remember that it was communicated, and never, ever, forget it.

"Or else what?"  
And then it showed her.

Azula was _very _fast, perhaps second only to an airbender, and even then she wouldn't be far behind, but she had never run so fast nor had a need so pressing before.

"_Uncle! Uncle! Start the airship, I've got to open an animal shelter! I have to save puppies and I have to do it NOW!_"

* * *

The girls tried to digest this new information, it didn't come easy, Toph somehow was the first to come to grips with it.

"So….." She bent an armrest out of the bath and steadied herself. "So Crazy Girl is nice now?"  
Ursa winced at the nickname but really couldn't find fault in it.

"Well Azula isn't crazy anymore and she still isn't _nice_ really." She brightened "But she's not evil anymore either. I mean she's not trying to take over neighboring countries, _or_ kill Zuko. Oh and she has been seeing that nice young earthbender girl, I mean boy, you know the one with the hair? That's a start right?"

"You mean Haru?"  
"That's the one!"

* * *

Haru whistled a jaunty little tune as he walked to pick up his girlfriend- heh, _girlfriend- _it had a nice ring to it, no more nasty rumors in the locker rooms for him, and she was a princess too! There was the slight issue that in the right light, if he hadn't had a good nights sleep, there was the tiny risk that she might be just a little bit prettier than he was, but with proper care that risk could be managed.

"Hey honey, time to hit the salon!"  
"I _told _you call me _honey _one more time and I will-"  
Azula's back went ramrod straight and her pupils narrowed to pinpricks.

"I'm taking you on a trip, and we are going, _now!_"  
"Oh kaaaaay, uh, let me just pack."  
"No time! Run, just run damn it!"

Half an hour later, for the first time in centuries a dragon flew over the palace, circled for a few minutes-some people thought it looked like it was searching for something- and then left. By general consensus it was considered a good omen.

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and now for some filler

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Deep under Ba Sing Sei two otherwise anonymous Dai Lee technicians discussed their handover sheets as they changed shifts, lets watch.

"_Yan Dee_ 12 is broken again."

"What do you mean broken?"

"He's……um……..he's got this smile."

"They're _Yan Dee's_ they're supposed to smile."

"Not like this they're not."

"sigh Fine. Whatever, which one is it again?"

"Number 12, you know? The one with the-" the tech made a motion with his fingers that somewhere else in the universe implied cheeseburgers for lunch. "eyebrows."

"Oh. Him."

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"Ok, now I see what you mean."

"See? I tried to tell you, it's been creeping me out all day."

"Yes well that's nice but that is no reason _to have your hand on my ass!_"

"Hey don't look at me I've been standing here the whole time, I'm at least 7 feet away from you."

"What the hell? Was it the _Yan Dee_?"

"Couldn't have been, he's standing even further away."

"I could have swo- _There, just then, did you see that_? He just looked _right_ at me, they're not supposed to do _that_!."

"I was watching him and I didn't see it. I think it's just the smile, even when he's facing away I know he's still smiling, it's like _it_ follows you, even when _he_ isn't."

"I feel the sudden urge to file a sexual harassment complaint."

"I know."

"What were you doing to it when it started?"

"Hey what makes you think it was my fault?"

"I'm not saying that but just do it for the sake of argument."

"Just basic speech drills, nothing complicated."

"Which ones?"

"Greetings J6."

"Which one is that again?"

"Oh you know, 'hello, my name is lee' and-"

Lets stop watching now.


	6. Chapter 6

"Since my daughter is edging closer to giving me grand children how about you Mai

"Since my daughter is edging closer to giving me grand children how about you Mai?"

Katara was sure she could detect more than just a casual interest in Ursa's voice, but Mai looked away.

"It's fine"

"_Liar!_"

"Oh you would know you voyeuristic little mole pig."

Toph gave an unladylike snort of amusement.

"Like there's been anything worth watching miss stabs-a-lot, 'nd I 'ave been keeping an ear close to the ground."

"I'll bet you have, since nobody wants a little blind gir-"

"Ladies, enough." Ursa brought them both up short. "Now apologize."

Everyone waited, Toph had balled her fists and Mai seemed to be subconsciously reaching for knives that weren't there.

"That means both of you."

There were a few more tense moments as both girls mentally weighed up their options, a potentially satisfying fight that would let off some of the tension between them, Mai had never been happy about Toph's apparent veto on Zuko's activities over hers to 'just go have fun' and the earthbender had a list of names that made "miss stabs-a-lot" seem like a term of loving endearment, it was that or not having Lady Ursa angry at them.

"S'ry Mai." "Sorry Toph."

Katara and Suki's eyes went wide, Toph had backed down, this was unheard of, Katara couldn't help but stare at the diminutive earthbender as she seem to be strangely smaller than she remembered her, while Suki gazed at Ursa with not a small amount of undisguised awe.

"Now that wasn't so hard was it? Hmm?"

"No 'nty." "No Aunty."

"Good, now Mai, is this true? Are you and Zuko having intimacy problems?"

Mai's eyes narrowed at Toph, who of course couldn't see this but she knew anyway, Toph Smiled.

"I'm not sure we should be having this conversation Princess Ursa."

Ursa seemed mildly set back by the use of her title but she was royalty of the old school, obstacles happened to other people.

"Nonsense dear, we're all from the Academy, I know what sort of classes they taught there, I was almost a teacher."

The non-fire nation girls looked blank, again except Toph's, her face was a study of intense concentration but this was due to her realizing that being an earthbender she could more or less levitate the ceramic teapot straight into her own hands.

Seeing the other girls confusion Ty Lee cleared things up.

"Fire Nation Academy for Girls, all the daughters of nobles go there to learn how to do all sorts of stuff, cooking, calligraphy, embroidery, poetry, conversation skills, court etiquette-"

Finishing school, Katara nodded understandingly, she had seen that sort of thing in ba sing sei, Suki twisted her mouth in disgust.

"-espionage, poisoning, armed and unarmed combat, tactics, command skills, seduction, politics, manipulation, business skills and of course firebending for the firebenders." Ty Lee rolled her eyes. "Y'know, wifely duties and stuff."

The waterbender looked shocked however Suki had a hungry look in her eyes.

"Could I enroll?"

"Fire nation only, besides that you're too old." said Mai in ingratiating monotone.

Suki looked was torn between disappointment and punching Mai in the face, it was not an easy choice but deciding to be polite she merely looked forlorn.

Ursa again waved off her concerns.

"I'm sure we could get you in Suki dear, what's the point of being a princess if i can't bend a few rules every now and again."

Suki's smile lit the room like a hundred candles.

"and if there's anything they don't teach you come to me and i'll do it myself, besides, you'll have to spend some time in the capital and get sokka to show you around." she added with a saucy wink.

Suki blushed and couldn't meet the princess's eyes.

"Thank you Aunty Ursa."

"Now Mai, you still haven't mentioned what the problem between you and Zuko is."

The abnormally gloomy girl seemed to become even more so.

"If you must know the problem _is_ the academy."

"I'm sorry dear i don't follow, from what i remember the lessons were very informative in that regard, i know I never had any problems with that, quite the opposite in fact."

"Well Zuko has a problem with it." she muttered bitterly." I was trying the fifth lesson"

"aaaahh" Ty Lee smiled knowingly even as Mai's ears burned red with embarrassment "Pearl diving."

Suki nodded immediately, for Katara it took a few seconds longer, Toph didn't care, she had tea.

"He seemed to be enjoying it and then I told him all the girls learnt it at the academy, and then he freaked out."

Ursa frowned in thought.

"So THAT was what all that screaming was about, but that was over three months ago!"

For no reason she was prepared to admit this cheered Katara up _immensely_, but she still wasn't totally convinced.

"Are you sure that's all you said?"

Mai sunk down further into the water and muttered something too quietly to be heard, except by Toph who looked stunned and proceeded to snort, giggle and then began to cackle madly.

Katara was interested though and encouraged her to speak up, purely for the sake of helping Mai get this off her (now that she got a better look at it she was sure) _flatter_ chest of course, this was Katara, altruism incarnate.

"I _said_ 'Don't worry Zuzu, I'll make this good for you.'"

Toph cackled harder.

"6/10 for phrasing but really it's all in the delivery." Said Ursa.

"……uh……." Said Suki.

"You _do_ know that only _Azula_ ever calls him that, right?" Said Katara.

"But Azula's so pretty, how could that be a bad thing?" Said Ty Lee.

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_What?!_

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"Ty Lee….." Ursa had to pause to collect her suddenly fragmented thoughts. "Uh…….dearie there are _laws_ against that sort of thing."

"Not for royalty." She grinned widely. "it was repealed for members of the royal family 324 years ago."

"Ty, even as I say this I just know I'm going to regret it. _Why_-" Mai was pinching the bridge of her nose as if to ward off a headache "-were you looking up loopholes for incest in the fire nation."

"'Cause I thought they were already doing _it_." Ty Lee made some completely unnecessary hand motions to further emphasize what 'it' was. "turns out I was wrong but wow, watch them for ten minutes, it's like Azula has him all worked up and frustrated and wrapped around her little finger and Zuko looks like he's about an inch away throwing her up against the wall and ravishing her. It's hot!"

"Hate. It's called hate Ty, they detest each other."

"I don't know…..they're both very pretty people."

"_Suki!_" Katara felt betrayed.

"What? I have eyes."

"Ty Lee, I don't think that-"

"I figured it would stop them fighting."

Ursa held up a finger as she were about to say something but stopped, she blinked, twice. It's worth noting that the siblings' last fight had nearly burnt down a wing of the palace.

"We'll talk later."


	7. Chapter 7

As always please review, the authors' ego needs feeding, or being put down, constructive criticism is as desired as praise.

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The Western Air Temple was designed (obviously) with the air bending monks in mind, and despite being made of stone every room felt open. And being made for air benders, the ventilation was excellent. It is also true that the temple had been unused for 100 years, and as such there are certain housekeeping and maintenance issues that were neglected- considering the tenants were in fact dead- this was seen as excusable. Of all the house keeping issues: animal droppings, decaying organics (both mundane and macabre), cobwebs and the like, the problem of dust seems somewhat insignificant, there are however branches of mathematics that have something to say about this, often referring to butterflies and hurricanes.

* * *

Katara realized that with the rest of the girls having already vented their respective spleens, that attention was rapidly gravitating to her, and this was not good.

"What about the Avatars 'girl'?" Mai had been brought up in the aristocracy of the fire nation; if there was ever a lowlier group of acid tongued pit spider vipers to hold a grudge it hadn't been found yet.

_Bitch_.

The Avatar in question- still in hiding -perked up, this was what he'd been waiting for. Not some silly girly talk about jewelry, and besides, after Katara becomes vegan she won't have anything to do with pearls, or any other shellfish products for that matter.

Through his mystical spiritual link to his past lives, Aang became dimly aware that one of the previous avatars was angry and trying to tell him something, well more angry than the others, most of his pre-incarnations seemed to disapprove of the listening in to Katara, but they had been wrong before so it was probably just Kyoshi…Avatar Kyoshi had never really gotten over the fact that he had been right all along, and that airbender philosophy was just plain better that her earthbender mentality.

_Heh, earthbenders, they're wacky._

* * *

Actually, it was Roku berating the current Avatar.

"No you idiot, pearling is a _good_ thing, a _GOOD_ thing!"

"Awwwwwww yeeeeeaaaaaah."

"Shut up Kuruk."

"So _that's_ how you got that crown."

"You too, Yang Chen."

* * *

"We're fine, really, nothing to tell."

Hearing the positive proclamation Aang gave himself a little thumbs up and big grin, everything was A O K, there was going to some _serious_ kissing tonight, maybe he could even try for a little tongue!

Suki gave Katara a skeptical glance as she nudged Toph who had just begun to doze off, and whispered something in her ear.

"Mrrah? Whu'zat? 'Tara?"

"What was that again Katara, I think Toph missed it."

Katara reminded herself that Sokka would never forgive her if she turned her almost sister in law into a Kyoshicicle, and with that option not feasible Katara as subtly as she could waterbent herself so she was floating just a tiny bit off the stone seat so that Toph wouldn't be able to feel her heart beat through the rock. Toph realized this and she gave her a mildly terrifying grin though Katara was _fairly_ certain that the earthbender was bluffing and wouldn't call her out on her deception.

Toph can detect heartbeats through though the earth the same way she sees.

Toph can also tell when people are lying.

Both of these things are true, they are just unrelated. While it can certainly help to feel someone's pulse to measure for the unconscious stress that lying creates, it is far better to be able to pick up on the subtle changes in tone and timbre in their voice to detect falsehoods. Toph listened and continued to grin like the drunken maniac that she was.

"What about the wedding then? _Aang_ said this spring, _surely_ you're not holding out on us Sugar Queen, it's not like you didn't _know_ you were going to get married, is it?"

Toph's tone left no question as to if Katara had really known or not, earthbenders were not known for the most subtle senses of humor, and while Toph, raised as one of the upper class, could appreciate a refined verbal spar and delicate irony as much as the next noble. Nothing elicited a hearty, uncomplicated, Earth Kingdom belly laugh so much as somebody hitting someone else, or making them mad enough to want to.

"I guess I knew that he would want to get married eventually."

_Sort of……in an abstract sort of way, after all wasn't that the happy ending? _

"We just never really talked about _when_."

Katara tried not to think about how she had said the exact same thing not two hours ago, and it was only the thought of this bath, and talking with these other women that had prevented her from beating the _snot_ out of Aang, herself. Toph heard the internal struggle in her voice and decided to let this play out for a bit; Katara was far more like her brother than it seemed, and both were world champions a putting their own feet in their mouth.

"Isn't he only twelve? I mean first of all, why bother with marriage at _all_, but _twelve?_ Is he even, _you know_-" Ty Lee, seemingly at a loss for words, extended her pinky finger. "-_capable_?"

Trying her very best to ignore that of all people, she had just shocked _Ty Lee_ with the specifics her relationship, Katara defended her dating the avatar as best she could.

"He's thirteen.." It sounded weak, even to her own ears "-and a half."

Katara looked around, she was surrounded by scowls of disapproval, except of course on Mai, _she was smirking_; and as much as she hated to admit it, Mai was prettier- _not that she was like a certain pink obsessed circus freak in that respect _-when she was smirking. Katara couldn't help but wonder if that's why the gloomy girl was such a horrible, bitchy, moo-sow. Vanity could be such an incredibly powerful motivator.

Katara also began to realize that she wasn't getting out of this discussion with anything less than the instigation of an all out brawl, involving six naked women. She instinctively felt that that would be somehow playing right into Ty Lee's grabby little hands, and as such the idea was summarily dismissed.

"He never even _mentioned_ it." she muttered.

From behind the wall Aang almost snapped his fingers with the revelation, he _knew_ he had been forgetting something, he forgot to propose.

"I mean, aren't I supposed to part of the decision making process?"

Aang's mouth dropped open in shock, how blind had he been?

If Katara organized the wedding then he would be able to spend more time searching the world for more airbenders. The fact that the last time he had been into town he'd found a book with at least a hundred species of animal that he'd never even _heard_ of let alone ridden, had of course nothing to do with it.

"Whenever I want to talk about more serious stuff he ..." Katara tried her best to explain and Toph tried her best to help her.

"You mean he's still running away?"

Aang may have taken offence to the running away remark, except he was too busy hyperventilating as silently as he could, his tween-age mind boggled as one thing, and one thing only reverberated through it; _Katara wanted to wanted to get more serious_.

"It's not that, it's just every time I try and talk about anything that's…_difficult_, he gets this _look_ on his face that makes me feel like I just kicked Momo."

Mai looked confused and muttered. "The lemur? Isn't that a good feeling?"

"Ohmispirits!" Squealed Ty Lee. "You're cute whipped!"

"Am not!" Katara realized something. "What do you mean 'cute' whipped?"

"I do it all the time, I'll show you."

Ty Lee kneeled in front of Katara and looked up, there was a brief moment of focus and then her expression changed. Ty Lee's eyes got big and shimmery, her lips got pouty and Katara could swear the bottom one quivered; just a little, and the gymnast gave a pathetic little sniff. To Katara it was utterly surreal, Ty Lee who normally resembled Aang enough, that she had more than once wondered if she was an air nomad descendant, was mimicking Aang's expression so perfectly- Granted the perky breasts and long brown hair were new (the breasts perhaps not so much, damn that play)- that she felt a Pavlovian burst of guilt exactly as if the Avatar himself were right there wibble lipping at her. Katara froze as those big grey eyes got closer, and closer, and-

"_Ahem!_" Ursa cleared her throat loudly and deliberately to break the spell. "I _know_ your parents and the Academy taught you better than that Ty Lee, one does not seduce other women in communal baths, it's unhygienic."

Ty Lee, a hair's breadth away, swore softly and waded back to her seat, but not before giving Katara one last calculating and _hungry_ look that made the hair on the back of the Master waterbenders neck stand on end.

Behind the privacy screen Aang tried to comprehend what exactly was going on, whipping cute things and kicking Momo? What kind of crazy stuff were the girls talking about? As for seducing someone on the bath, how dumb was that? Where would you put the flowers?

Taking little notice of the surprisingly predatory acrobat the Princess of the Fire Nation tapped her chin in deep thought.

"To be fair to the boy, his age does explain some things. Though, I'd always just assumed he was immature for his age, and short."

The _Saviour of the World™_ choked in indignation, _short_? What did she mean _short_? Ok just because he wasn't as tall as Appa, not everyone could be Kyoshi, well, ok, technically speaking he _was_ Avatar Kyoshi and every other avatar as well but that was besides the point.

It _was_ besides the point; that was something that was going to become quite apparent, the real point was that his indignant outrage had just made a sound loud enough to be heard by the rooms other occupants.

Ursa stepped out of the bath with stealth that was surprising for such a well built woman, and walked to the towels (red, of course) to cover herself. Not that she needed them to dry off, since she just turned the droplets of water that clung to her to steam with her own body heat. Now covered, barely, she walked to the other side of the screen so she could come up behind the possible pervert. If she was shocked by the eavesdropper/peeping tom being the Avatar she did not show it.

"_Avatar Aang!_" She spoke with a voice that was used to serious command, so much so that the orange and yellow clad airbender had to stop himself from saluting.

"I trust you have an _astoundingly_ good reason for being here, _hiding_, in the women's baths."

"………"

Aang would have said _something_, really he would have, although admittedly it would have been something along the lines of:

'Um, well, you see…..bugs! Yeah, bugs! There has been a problem around the temple with 'em, and I was just looking for the nest.',

which would have fooled _no one_.

He didn't, though there is a reason for this; Lady Ursa had _legs_, in fact it would be better to say _Legs_, because they were certainly long enough to deserve the capital letter if not an exclamation mark, something Aang noticed before he looked even higher, only to then notice that the princess was tapping her foot impatiently which was doing …….things…….to parts of her body, _front _parts, that made the boy who had mastered airbending before he was 12, for a few seconds, quite forget how to breathe.

One of Aang's past lives- an Earth Kingdom Avatar -who had quite the mathematical mind, and apparently no interest in women tried to use a primitive form of calculus to figure out the rate that their odds of survival were approaching zero, but he wasn't fast enough.

Aang's body, which may be said at this point to be considerably smarter than Aang himself, remembered that breathing was something it should do, and he breathed in, a large mote of dust hitting just the_ right_ spot in his sinus…..

"AHHH-CHOOOO!"

Ursa was no slouch in the bending arts, and not even an airbender sneeze would break her stance, but the towel was not so lucky.

_Ah, there we go_, thought the Earth Kingdom Avatar_, we've hit zero possibility of survival. The next Avatar was going to be watertribe? Yes?_


	8. Chapter 8

The one in which Suki becomes a fan girl (the other kind).

be warned, my former beta is sadly busy and the person who volunteered is taking to long for my desire for feedback, so grammar may be a little sticky.

The Fire Nation balloon was small and not the newest but more importantly it had been nearby when she needed it, it creaked and groaned as the winds toyed with it, which made the both the occupants feel like they left their stomachs back at the last pocket of turbulence.

By a strange twist of fate the totally random direction that had been taken was the exact same route that Prince Zuko had followed the defeated "Gaang" back to the very same air temple that was currently under renovations. If Princess Azula had known that _and_ that her vessel was even the exact same model of airship that Zuko had taken when he had turned traitor she would have jumped out and used her fire bending to fly away before she developed sudden bouts of incompetence and somehow gained a disfiguring scar.

* * *

*Ahhhh- CHOO!*

There was little warning before the air bending assisted sneeze turned the room into a vortex of air but despite the raging indoor hurricane nobody dared to move. This actual storm was the brief calm before the proverbial storm in which Aang realised after seeing Princess Ursa in all her towel-less glory, that kissing Katara might not quite be the be all and end all of relationships, though what was the end he wasn't quite sure yet.

Pain seemed to be the likely candidate for some reason he couldn't quite put his finger on.

*FOOOOOOOM!*

The proverbial calm was then obliterated by a cyclone of blue white flame in the opposite direction and it was only Katara's well honed battle instincts that made her turn the bathwater into a clear overhead ice shield to protect the occupants of the bath. What happened next by all accounts felt like it was all in slow motion, Aang raced around the room so fast he did not even touch the floor with the blue and white flame looking for all the world like a wave powering along the walls ready to crash over the air bender. Aangs eyes were inexorably drawn to the centre of the room and the clear dome of ice that while shielding the five naked girls from the wind and heat did nothing to protect their privacy. After almost having stumbled on the last wall due to till this point previously unimagined amount of exposed female flesh he ran past Princess Ursa and out the door with arms out stretched to steady himself.

*smack*

Uh oh.

* * *

The turbulence had eased off till there was an eerie stillness aside from the noise of the steam engine powered by the occasional burst of blue flame, Haru and Azula were both bored out of their gourds.

"So….uh……Azula, you want to fool around some?"

Haru's earnest green eyes were met by half lidded gold.

"Eh, may as well, it'll kill a few hours." She seemed to think about this a bit more. "Hmm, actually there's plenty of rope here."

Azula walked around the airship testing a few potential sturdy bollards and finding them to her satisfaction.

"Yes. Lets 'fool around'"

* * *

"ZUUUUUUUUKOOOOOOOO!"

The current fire lord scowled as the veritable whirlwind of orange and yellow stopped only a yard before him and blew his elaborate robes into disarray, he had a sneaking suspicion that he already knew what this was about, but there were other things that needed to be addressed.

"Avatar Aang, so good of you to drop by. Since you neglected to organise the feast I went ahead and arranged my personal chef to take care of……"

Aang was looking up at Zuko in a way that was starting to make the fire lord uncomfortable, that expression looked a lot better on Ty Lee.

"I think Katara might be mad at me."

Zuko closed his eyes for a moment and let out a deep soul cleansing breath.

"OK Aang, I'll talk to Katara, tell me what happened."

"Well….-"

* * *

Katara melted the ice dome protecting and let it flow back into the bath a split second before she realised something very important.

"EEEEEEEEEEK!" "WHAT THE HELL SUGAR QUEEN?!" "Ye-ouch! That's cold!" "Peasant bitch! You did that on purpose!"

"Sorry sorry, I'll bend the water down the drain."

A couple of quick bending moves later the group was now dry but confronted with a more embarrassing problem, Ursa's (over?)reaction had all but incinerated their clothes leaving nothing left except for the towel that had once been wrapped around the ample bosom of the elder fire princess, which was still fluttering around the room only to be caught by Ursa's outstretched hand. Her golden eyes wide with shock suddenly narrowed into sharp focus, Princess Ursa wrapped herself in the only barely adequate towel and turned on her heel but not before giving one last determined and slightly ominous proclamation.

"You will all hold this position while i obtain more suitable attire."

* * *

"-and then i ran here as fast as i could looking for you, do you think Katara will be mad Zuko? I don't want to be sent to bed early again."

"Nrrgle"

Zuko's movements were stiff and unnatural as he walked back to his airship, his jaw clenched so tightly that he would have been well served to visit the royal dentist when he got back to the fire nation.

"Why are we going to your ship Sifu Hotman?"

Zuko twitched, badly.

"Wsftz!"

Zuko kept walking up the gangway and straight towards his private cabin.

"Sorry, I know you don't like that name but it just seems to suit you." Aang tried for his more endearing smile but was ignored as zuko took off his outer robes and stripped till he wore only his training pants.

"Uh we're not going to play the naked game are we Zuko? Kuzon and Bumi used to like the naked game a lot but i didn't like it really."

Zuko paused, the rage that was singing a battle cry through his blood momentarily derailed.

_That......may have been the most disturbing thing i have ever heard._

He was broken out of his contemplation by the sounds of someone else stomping through his ship past his door to the other cabins, there were more noises as the unknown stomper seemed to be ransacking one of the rooms.

Zuko picked up his swords and swung them across his back as the stomper stomped back past his room and off the ship, he hated being interrupted.

It is worth mentioning at this point that the reign of fire lord zuko has been up to this point at all times a study of calm, his reaction to all issue domestic or abroad measured, well thought out and without impulse. Every critic met with a smile, every hindrance met with polite insistence and nothing more, every issue raised about his nation, his relationships, his behavior all without losing his temper. In short, this being Zuko, he had so much bottled up if he didn't get some release he would have ulcers before he was twenty.

Zuko could feel the anger bubbling up, buoying his consciousness to the level of little more than an observer, as rage and impulse took over, he felt light as a feather and warm as if embraced. He and rage were old and intimate friends reunited, though he had one more fully lucid moment.

"Aang, we're friends, so I'll give you a twenty second head start."

"Wait what?"

* * *

Katara was in something of a state of shock, the world was not making much sense anymore. Ursa hadn't returned with clothes as such, she had brought armour and battle dress though she had marveled at the silk underclothes until Ty Lee had cheerfully informed her of the exact reason for the silk.

[fact; the Mongolians had silk underclothes because if stuck by an arrowhead that broke up in the flesh it would penetrate the flesh but not the silk so they could pull it out and be sure that they got all the fragments out].

This by itself wasn't so bad, but there was other stuff that added to the surreal nature, Ursa had done little more than snap her fingers and Ty Lee and Mai had instantly gone from bubbly and boring, respectively, to twin demure handmaidens assisting their lady with her amour. Ursa's amour itself was odd as far as Katara was concerned, it seemed to little more than a silk dress, slit up to the thigh, with arm bracers and showing far too much leg and cleavage to be sensible for a fight.

"It's light weight and allows full freedom of movement." was the princesses off hand reply.

"You might want to avoid high kicks though." Katara muttered

"What was that dreary?"

"Nothing, nothing important."

That was small potatoes though compared to Toph however, Toph had given them all mournful puppy-kitten eyes as she held the now empty teapot.

"Why is the Tea gone?"

All this paled in comparison to the change in Suki who had shyly asked "aunty" Ursa if she could call her "big sister" Ursa.

"Big sister Ursa is so pretty."

Katara couldn't deny this.

"-and strong and smart and cool."

The water tribe girl dared to give her nearly sister in law a sidelong glance, it is worth noting that Avatar Kyoshi didn't just name Kyoshi Island after herself she formed a culture and became almost the locally worshiped god so it's also worth noting that among the Kyoshi Warriors there is something of a Kyoshi shaped hole in their collective psyches.

"-and tall and she's got _such_ big feet." Suki sighed, lost in her own little fantasy world.

"Katara?" Suki asked shyly. "Do you think Big sister Ursa would look pretty if she wore more green?"

"Why don't you ask her to join the Kyoshi warriors and be done with it?" She snapped

"OH I couldn't do that, it would be asking too much!" Suki blushed beet read and held her face in her hands. "Would it? Yes, too much, too much, she is a busy princess after all. Maybe if we gave her a uniform she could try it on just once, like an honorary membership......and maybe give me an order or two....."

Katara gapped like a fish at the tough as nails butt kicking warrior she knew who had so humbled her brother mumbled happily, off again in her private little world.

"....I'll defend the village big sister.......we'll attack their flank together........oh big sister, of course I'll scrub your back....."

_This was getting creepy. _Thought Katara.

"_I got it!_"

"Got what?"

"Big sister Ursa must be Kyoshi's re-incarnation!"

Katara was glad to be on more sure ground.

"No, that wouldn't work. Kyoshi was the avatar, Aang is her reincarnation."

"But he can't be! I mean look at her, and Aang! Aang is such a...such a -" Suki looked stricken as she groped for the right word. "- pansy."

"He defeated Ozai." Katara huffed, she was tired of having to justify Aangs decision.

"I was there Katara, he didn't even give Ozai a fat lip."

"He took away his bending, that's worse than death he's completely powerless, he'll never be a danger to …..anyone……uh….."

Katara couldn't help but notice that Ty Lee and Mai had stopped attending to Ursa for a moment and the she herself was the centre of attention.

"Oh yes, because all non benders are not even worth thinking about aren't they, they'll never be in positions of power, never be a threat."

It was the most passion she had ever heard in Mai's voice as three of the most dangerous non-benders in the world stared down at the blue eyed girl.

"I'll go look for Aang on my own then shall I?"

"Very well, just remember our mission." Ordered Princess Ursa, as she tied her hair up in a high and oddly familiar pony tail. "_We must capture the Avatar!_"

Katara nodded numbly and left the room, no doubt in her mind about the ability and more importantly the drive of the other girls as there was one more bizarre thing from that eventful bath that was turning her world on its side;

The bright red Aang sized hand print on Ursa's right butt cheek.

* * *

In the spirit world Yang Chen was on the warpath.

"Who the hell did _that?!?!_"

She glared at her fellow avatars.

Kuruk gave his best easy going smile. "Eyyyyyy."

"Oh of course I should have %&#ing known." lamented the airbending nun.

There was a dignified clearing of a throat.

"Well, not just him."

"Oh %&#ing _EW!_ You're her great grandfather _and_ gayer than a tree full of drunk flying %&#ing lemurs!"

"We're Royalty, we're like that."

"%&#ing hells I need a cigarette, men are cow-pigs. C'mon Kyoshi, lets see.....Oh no."

Kyoshi tried not to smile.

"Wait, you just want to see someone beat the snot out of Aang right?"

"Well, there's that too."

"But you're over two hundred years older than.......you know what? %&# you all, I'm going to see if there's a way to get booze in this place."


End file.
